Friday, March 26, 2010

God of War III and the new blog

I took the night off from my new favorite PS3 game to bang out my first entry in the gaming journal. Up until recently I was doing my usual gaming thing - a little of this a little of that - but for the last week my gaming time has been dedicated to a single epic game - God of War III. I won't rehash my thoughts on the 10 or so hours I've put into the game so far, I will just mention the part of yesterday's action that stands out in my mind. It wasn't my run-in with Hephaestus. It wasn't the huge battle with Chronos where I cut my way out of his stomach. No, I just have two words for last night's action - tits.

Poseidon's princess started off the festivities by baring her bathing beauties. Then she nobly sacrificed herself for me and I wandered into Aphrodite's Chamber where she was getting nasty in her bed with her two maiden friends - there were more ample Greek breasts than you could shake a cestus at. And Sir Isaac Newton himself couldn't have done a better job on the physics on these things - immersive!

So I laid down with Aphrodite and did the traditional sex minigame that comes standard with every GOW game. After we finished, the circle prompt was still over her so I did her again, and then one more time for good measure - but my thumb slipped off the button and the maidens look all disgusted with me and Aphrodite says "am I too much woman for you?". What the hell? I just gave this slut two orgasms in like a minute and a half and she's disappointed in my performance? No wonder her husband Hephaestus has no freakin self-respect. Anyway, then I left and some other stuff happened. Tomorrow night - Hera's Garden maze.

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Fallguy40 said...

She's the goddess of love. She expects a little extra. Next time, hold down L3 and R2 at the same time for the Orgasm of the Gods.

I have gotten just a little past the Poseidon Princess at this point. Lovely breasts by the way. Apparently though I killed her because I got a trophy for it. C'mon Kratos, you didn't have to kill her. There were other "options".

I hope Naughty Dog is taking note from this game. Poor Nate Drake needs something warmer than innuendo to hold onto in Uncharted 3.After all, he and Sully followed the ho's in Montreal.

MadPlanet said...

Yup - I thought for sure Kratos would bed Poseidon's wench. Her death was a little fuzzy since it was offscreen for me but I assumed the wheel that was holding the gate open crushed her.

Fallguy40 said...

What's it going to be Kratos, tits or destiny?

Kratos: "Tits!"